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Monday, September 18th, 2006
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Friday, November 5th, 2004
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| Time: | 12:10 pm. |
| Mood: |  complacent. |
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Should I feel bad or just laugh??
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Monday, October 4th, 2004
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Oh what a wonderful day, my oh my .
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| Time: | 11:20 pm. |
| Mood: |  contemplative. |
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All is lost when complaining cannot get anything done what are you to do? Take a stand? I think not, I am too lazy.
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Sunday, February 22nd, 2004
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| Time: | 6:12 pm. |
| Mood: |  irritated. |
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It seems that everyone is changing. drugs, booze, and cigarettes are the cause! I hate all that stuff!! It changes everyone and it is not good! To make it worst almost everyone does it!
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Sunday, February 15th, 2004
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| Time: | 11:06 pm. |
| Mood: | contemplative. |
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It is hard to see someone you love as a best friend hurt themselves. You do not understand why thy do what they do. How can they want to die when they could have anything they wanted. Why do they torture themselves, and why do they brag about it? How can slitting your wrists make the pain go away?
I don't understand anymore. Friends who you thought were prefectly happy are miserabley depressed under the surface. When they are all alone they feel they have no one. No one to hold them, no one to tell them what to do, and no one to make things right again. Hopefully they will stop hurting themselves and hopefully I can make it better for them.
When the other one is gone you look to where she used to be and think "How do I go on without her when we said we would be best friends forever." I believed it and she believed it but how come it is no longer true. Words to not escape my mouth in her direction no longer and the same goes for her. COnsidering her your best friend still when she knows all about you execpt for what you have become. I bet she could tell me everythin about me up until theses last few monthes. and I could tell you everything about her except for hew new life and without her in my life what do I have? I have a love that no one can have but all I wish is that I could have both... But I dont care to bother her if she iappy and if we a re both happy then there is no need to fix what has gone wrong.
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Tuesday, September 23rd, 2003
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| Time: | 11:29 pm. |
| Mood: | thoughtful. | | Music: | death?. |
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The end of the world comes so close when you have nothing left to live for. Hopefully the end is so far away that you can never feel it or sense its being.
When it becomes to much for him, he takes his own life and that is the end of a tragic tale.
She feels it go in and out and she does not want it there. She struggles but it continues and until it isover she will feel the helplessness. And when it is over she will blame herself and hide forever. But there is no real use in hiding when you know you did it to yourself. You let him over power you and now you will pay til the last of your days.
She is gone and that is what I really want. A new broom sweeps away old friends and now she is gone replaced with the new broom, but it seems she has purchased a new broom also. But will the prices of the new broom really be a bargain in the end?
Story plots are made here
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Tuesday, August 26th, 2003
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Is there always an end to such greatness? Seems there is. Why do such things always end in a great fire?
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Sunday, August 24th, 2003
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| Time: | 9:44 pm. |
| Mood: |  uncomfortable. |
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Changing to fit in or changing to become a better person?
Or no change and everyone hates you?
What is a best friend, one who compliments, or critizes?
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Wednesday, August 20th, 2003
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| Time: | 12:15 am. |
| Mood: |  ecstatic. |
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Being this cheerful isnt good...........
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Monday, August 18th, 2003
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| Time: | 10:37 pm. |
| Mood: |  gloomy. | | Music: | Dashboard. |
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Can't help feeling the pain that was felt so long ago, but will it last.
To hope not is to wish for the impossible.
The feelings will always be there, just not as strong as they used to be.
New feelings arise and over take the old ones.
They aren't strong enough to erase the memories off the once happiness.
The new feelings hurt just as much and even more.
They won't even go away and I know that. Never!
They are way to strong, deep, and meaningful.
To hope they are mutal is a big wish.
To know they are mutal is a false sense of security.
TO know they aren't mutal, hurts down deep.
To wish they would last forever is hopeful.
But then again no one can ever be too hopeful.
Being pessimistic takes over all.
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Saturday, August 16th, 2003
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| Time: | 8:36 pm. |
| Mood: | indifferent. | | Music: | Dashboard. |
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I am not going to tell, I wish not too. I wish it wasnt so hard and hurtful, but yeah I wish not to say a thing. Thinking it through, there is more negative responses from the telling of this something, so this something will just stay in my head and never be leaked to the one that must know.
One person is in the same boat as I, not the secret thing, juet other things. I wish we werent so pathetic or stupid, but we are and we cant help it. It does it to the best of us. She needs as much help as me and we have no where to seek such information cause if we were to seek each other we would not know what to say cause we are the same. Why does everything have to be so complicated?
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Thursday, August 14th, 2003
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| Time: | 11:54 pm. |
| Mood: | contemplative. |
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Knowing something that will hurt another is not fun. It must be told, but is the pain worth it?
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| Time: | 11:54 pm. |
| Mood: | happy. | | Music: | Fastball:Out of my head. |
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Good to know that if i ever need attention all i have to do is die.
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Telling something you were not suppose to does not feel good. Do not do it or you will cry and feel real bad.
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Wednesday, August 6th, 2003
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| Time: | 11:03 pm. |
| Mood: | thoughtful. | | Music: | Eisley: I wasn't prepared?. |
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The feeling lasts forever, it will never go away and that is why it is so great and wonderful. To have it never ending would be the most greatest experience ever, but never can you be sure that will happen. The feeling is so awesome it has to last forever though. Doesn't it?
The word is so big and it means so much but is it true, it feels like it but never can you be too sure. To hope it is true isn't good enough, you must know if it is true before you act on it. To wish such a thing is a big step but sometimes you are just ready and then it will be true. To hope the best is sometimes disappointing when it lets you down, hopefully it will not let you down though. Have the most wonderful night anyone can have.
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| Time: | 9:56 am. |
| Mood: |  devious. |
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When you believe it can happen it will unless you give up.
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| Time: | 12:12 pm. |
| Mood: | disappointed. |
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When the waiting is over the pain is much greater than the actual waiting.
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| Time: | 12:22 am. |
| Mood: | bored. | | Music: | Dashboard. |
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The joy in waiting is the pain felt until it happens.
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Saturday, August 2nd, 2003
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| Time: | 9:22 pm. |
| Mood: | contemplative. |
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Why you so diffilcult?
Well why are you so easy?
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flavoredsoda's journal
